Interpersonal Communication: A Communication Skills Tip

I think it is easy to take our peers, friends, family and loved ones for granted. It takes so much conscious effort to stay respectful of each others' perspectives. And yet I have found that when I make the time to take people's opinions into consideration, it pays off. We believe that our thoughts are personal, but they are founded on the ideas of others that are spread over time through education, business, art and culture (not to mention religion, family, friends and so on.) What we think is personal is really "inter" personal. When we take our individual outlooks and acknowledge that they belong to a bigger web, it becomes easier to listen to and integrate with others. Interpersonal communication takes into account our environment, our non-verbal messages, sounds as well as words, and the moods, minds and intentions of those involved in the communication. We interact with people daily. Let's look at why we communicate. Isn't it to fulfill our desire to be known? And isn't it also because we want to feel a part of something bigger than 0urselves? It's easy to forget that the groups of people we spend our time with are actually our communities. And, funnily enough the words communicate and community come from the same latin root communus or common. What we share, we have in common. What we have in common, creates our community. Tim Borchers, a professor at Minnesota State University Moorhead, says there are four functions of interpersonal communication: 1. To gain information; 2. To build a context of understanding; 3. To establish identity; and 4. To meet interpersonal needs. Gaining information has a great purpose. By learning about the people we interact with, we develop trust which leads to deeper communication. In the workplace, we all know that working as a team is essential to getting the job done well. Our success is fundamentally based on how well we communicate with each other. This takes me back to the beginning of this week's blog entry: "I think it is easy to take our peers, friends, family and loved ones for granted. It takes so much conscious effort to stay respectful of each others' perspectives." With the beginning of 2010 upon us, let's add to our list of resolutions to gain as much information about the people we communicate with in order to develop respect; let's disclose more about ourselves so that the people we interact with begin to trust us more; and let's look at our interpersonal communication as an opportunity to build communities we look forward to living in. Stay tuned for more on building a context of understanding and insights into international communication in next week's blog post. To be added to Lanartco's Communication Performance Tip of the Week, please connect to this link or send your email address to info@lanartco.com.